Women in leadership positions in credit unions – Be the mentor you wish you had

Some people think that dreaming big means you think too highly of yourself—that big dreams signal you are arrogant or perhaps directionless. But in truth, having big dreams means you are determined to live on purpose, are nurturing a vision, and are taking steps to make it happen. I encourage you to dream big. Otherwise, you will wake up to something smaller.

Imagine how different your life would be if you actively pursued even a few of the dreams you had when you were little. Life was simpler then, and dreaming was something we all did and were not afraid to share. As we grow up, some of us abandon our dreams while others stop dreaming altogether.

It all comes back to your mindset. Allowing yourself to be inspired and encouraged by your dreams can prompt you to set goals and establish an implementable plan of action. If you believe you can accomplish those big dreams, why not go after them? Why settle for the small ones instead?

I cannot imagine a world without dreamers. Without them, we would not have the things we take for granted like cars, phones, lights, airplanes, computers, and the ability to connect globally. Take a jog outside your comfort zone and surround yourself with other dreamers. Support each other.

Mentors can play a huge role in turning your dreams into reality. My mentors have helped me tremendously, and I am privileged to mentor others. What should you look for in a mentor? Someone who has expertise in your chosen area, wants to help you succeed, and will help you get there. In addition to listening to and guiding you, mentors will celebrate your successes with you and help you make adjustments when things go astray, which is inevitable when venturing into new terrain.

Personally, I have started and re-started so many times that I cannot even remember all the chances I have taken along the way. Here are some of the biggies:

• I started a new career in the insurance industry at the age of forty knowing nothing about that particular industry
• I came through the ranks of insurance agents as one of the only women
• I became an agency manager without ever having formal training or mentoring

Our agency had no presence in North Carolina, and I was asked to build an agency there. For nearly a year, I travelled each week from Connecticut to North Carolina to establish an agency before moving there. Two years later I was asked to move to Dallas to take a corporate position building sales training, not knowing a soul there. I resigned from that big position to jump into the unknown again. I started my company, Selling In A Skirt, at the age of fifty-five and branched waaaay outside my comfort zone.

If I could do it all over, would I do it differently? No. Did I make mistakes? Definitely. Were the risks worth the rewards? Absolutely!  Women in leadership have many qualities that are inherent and may or may not be seen by others as important.  Taking a big step for you and others takes courage and giving back to others through mentoring and time,  takes generosity; two very important leadership qualities.

I am passionate about women starting out in the work environment. Mentoring young women has been a tremendous pleasure and honor for me. At one point a few years ago, I was officially and unofficially mentoring four women simultaneously. You may be thinking that it was a lot of work, but showing them the ropes not only helped me remember some things I took for granted, it also led me back to some of the basics I forgot. It was a win-win situation all the way around.

One of my greatest joys is giving with the pure intention of giving by paying it forward. Now make no mistake, my company is a for-profit company and I have bills to pay like everyone else, but I always make time to pay it forward and mentor young women.

For much of my career, I was either the only woman or one of the only women in the room. I launched my company to support women, particularly those working in male-dominated fields. I wanted to show women how to succeed in business without sacrificing their values or attributes. I wanted them to understand we inherently have amazing feminine qualities that can propel us forward in business … if we use them correctly.

While mentoring young women naturally complements my work at Selling In A Skirt, I mentored women for many years before launching this business. Each of the young women I have mentored throughout my career just needed a little help. Some may have needed it for a longer period of time than others, but in truth, what they all most needed was someone who cared. Someone to help them get a leg up without judging their mistakes, and someone who believed in them when maybe they felt like no one else did.

• A mentor offers perspective, insight, and encouragement.
• Mentors give their mentees the benefit of their education and experience to help develop the mentees’ skills and abilities.  
• Both parties need to want to be in this partnership and must feel free to ask each other questions and challenge one another. By no means is it necessary that they agree on everything.

This is how we all learn, and each relationship is unique. If you have mentored more than one person, you know firsthand how different each mentoring experience can be. Ideally your mentee will go on to mentor someone else, and the cycle of paying it forward will continue. Mentors learn more than they might expect, and the experience is priceless.  Remember, as a mentor, you probably have been there, done that and can share both your successes and lessons learned. You will probably see things in your mentee that they don’t even see in themselves…at least not yet. And, you can help them navigate that twisty-turny journey that you successfully did while also sharing in some pretty important connections for your mentees.

Did you know that 65% of women who are mentored, become mentors? Trust me, no one expects a mentor to do all the work…you are helping to shorten the learning curve a little bit. Your generosity will be acknowledged and appreciated and you will benefit from the experience more than you would have or could have imagined. When you hear “You’ve changed my life” you will know exactly what I’m talking about.

“A lot of people have gone further than they thought they could because someone else thought they could.”  Unknown